Fruitcake Stew Number Two

 Five, Four, Three, Two, One

 Everybody On The Bus, Let's Make A Run

 To The New Age Store Around The Bend.

Wanna Fruitcake Blend (CM)

 That Won't Offend.

 Like The Party Last Week

 I Must Be Cheap

With This Holiday Treat

 With Tomato, Bananas And Blood, Red Beets (CM)

QueasyArt

 Prunes (CM), Taters And Cream Of Wheat

 Fruitcake Makes It Sweeter

For Great Stew I Thank The Divine Guides

 Faithing's Like Fruitcake Stew, All Faiths Fly

(John 14:6; Acts 4:12)

 It's All Good, Faith's A High

 Do I Hear A Trumpet?

 "A Little Bit" Of Kwaanza If You Please

 "A Little Bit" Of Christmas "Is All I Need..."

 What About The Hindus, Let Me See.

(John 10:6-15)

 A Little Bit Of Santa, Ain't It Fun

 "A Little Bit Of Mary" Where's God's Son?

 A Little Bit Of Hannukah In My Life

 A Little Moroni-ca, Moron-I

(Galatians 1:8,9)
 The Little Bitty Christ Child, Makes Me Cry.

(Instrumental: 21 Seconds)

'Jump up and down and move it all around'

  
Do The Hanky Panky

(Golden Calf Awards)

 With Every God In Town

 Have Faith In Faith

 Let Feelings Fool

 Don't Believe Jesus Or The Golden Rule

Fruity And  Gay

Embrace All Views

 And With Enough Bland Faith

(Rev. 3:14-20)

You Got Fruitcake Stew

A Little Harmonica On My Side

 A Little Bobby Dylan Makes It Rhyme.

 A Whole Lotta Ketchup, Got It Made

 Every Little Doctrine I Embrace

 Every Combination I Will Taste

 A Little Bit Scary If Not Right

 I Hope I Never Find Out If I'm Blind

 A Little Karma Fruitcake Before The Fry

(Instrumental: 25 Seconds)

Fruitcake Stew #2

Uhhhhh!

Help Me!!

(Foghorn)

 "Trumpet, The Trumpet"

(Resume:)　

 A Little Bit Of Vomiting In My Life

A Little Bit Of Pepto By My Side

A Little Bit Depleted, I Need Some Sleep.

 Burning In My Bosom, Feel The Heat?

 A Little Bit Of Tundra On My Tongue

A Little Bit Scary All Night Long

 A Bit Of Diahrhea, In My Depends.

This Fruitcake Stew's A Frightening Blend.

'I - do - all'-To

Not Offend Any Divine Guides

Don't Know Who's Wrong And Who's Right

 Just That I'm Gonna Puke Or Die

Fruitcake Stew #2

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEvVkWfglqY

 

You Are a Hopeless Liberal if You:

Actually Believe the Monkey Stories They Have Been Feeding You All These Years.

Think the Oscars Are Politically Neutral.

Believe the Millionaire Osama must Have Just Had a Rough Childhood.

Keep a Straight Face When One of Those Television Shows Says the Earth is Millions of Years Old.

Think the Colbert Report and the Daily News with Jon Stewart is Wholesome Family Entertainment.

Think the Bible Allows For Evolution Theory.

Think the Cambrian Explosion is a Minor Point Hardly Worth Mentioning.

Don't Think it Odd That the Meteor Only Killed Dinosaurs and Birds With Teeth.

Think it is All Right For Other Animals to Kill And Eat But Not the Human Animal.

Think Fox News is the Only News Channel Worth Making Fun of.

Think the 'Origin of Species' by Darwin actually explains the Origin of Species.

Think the Only Real Difference Between Micro Evolution and Macro Evolution is One of Spelling.

You Think Sadaam Just Needed a Good Talking to.

Don't Know When the Plaster Ends and the Bone Begins When Assembling the Latest Dinosaur Exhibit.

"Stupid Idiot" is Your Best Argument Against Conservatives.

Get Your Best Ideas From David Letterman and Jay Leno.

http://FireDavidLetterman.com

Believe 'To Each His Own', Except When You Spot A Conservative.

You Think That if We Just Let Terrorists Rule The World They Would Stop Being Terrorists.

Actually Believe that 'Separation of Church and State' is in the Constitution.

Actually Believe That The Bible Says: "And God Saw All That He Had Made and said, 'It Needs Millions of Years of Work." (Genesis 1:31)

BJ Maxwell 08/29/2006

Copyright ©

Some Additions:

Know there are no absolutes, except that Conservatives are absolutely wrong.

Think That Jerry Springer is an educational show and also a great dancer.

Cannot Understand why Your Liberal Views Aren't Working On Your Family

OR

Don't Think It Hypocritical To Be Liberal In Your World View but Conservative In The Upbringing Of Your Family.

Were Tempted To Name Your First Child Gandhi

Understand that Your Watch Needed a Designer and Builder But Think the Universe came about Through a Mere Explosion.

Say There Is No Evidence For God But Cannot Say What Kind of Evidence Would Convince You of His existence.

You Think That Hitler Just Needed a Good Talking To.

Your Second Best Argument is to Read the First Paragraph of a Conservative Article and Then Say, 'So What Is Your Point' OR 'I Disagree.'

Try to Save the Whales But Not the Unborn.

Bj Maxwell

09/22/2006

Copyright ©

One Liners Sum Up Your View Of Conservatives While Using Numerous Oxymorons To Sum Up Your Own.

Think That The Word 'Innocent' Is Only One Of Those Many Filler Words That Conservatives Use To Prove Their Point.

Bj Maxwell

09/19/2008

10/28/2008

Copyright ©

Are You A Liberal Or An Enabler?

You Condemn The Preemptive Doctrine Of Bush (First Strike) But Not The Preemptive Doctrine Of Abortionists.

Part One:

Part Deux: